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Photo: Phillip Jones/Vent Haven Museum..
In Fort Mitchell, Kentucky, there’s a haven for ventriloquist dummies.

Whenever I saw ventriloquist dummies in childhood, I was fascinated that they could seem to talk. You don’t see them nowadays that much, and it seems that fewer people are learning the skills that let them appear to “throw their voices” into those dummies.

Mina Tavakoli , a neophyte ventriloquist, writes at N+1 that there’s a place in Kentucky where the art is alive and well.

“A half-nude, three-foot figure called me to a table just beside the vending machines. … ‘I’m Dicky!’ he squeaked.

“I wagged my pen in front of his tight little face. ‘Dicky,’ I repeated. [It was then] right as Dicky’s jaw flung open, that his ventriloquist  —  his father, his frère, his semblable; the standard abbreviation going forward is vent  —  sneezed. At that second, Dicky did too. The vent trumpeted into his tissue and held it in front of his wooden child, who did the same, loudly and juicily. …

“We were all in Kentucky. Side by side by side, we stood near the entrance of the Vent Haven Ventriloquist ConVENTion. … Dummies were rising from zippered suitcases, lifted from velvet-lined trunks, coffined on banquettes with protective canvas bags on their heads, like prisoners expecting execution. Dummies congested every visible cranny of the Erlanger Holiday Inn in a huge interspecies fiesta of dwarves, worms, baboons, children, et cetera.

“The human delegation was only slightly less mixed. Many attendees were entertainers  —  clowns, cruise-ship performers, Santa impersonators, balloon artists (known in the trade as ‘twisters’), theme-park proprietors, theme-park employees, and (hugely overindexed) magicians  —  clapping one another on the back and nodding like Marines celebrating dockage on home soil. …his was the ConVENTion’s welcome reception, where the cream of ventdom was swarming the warm and ferny lobby to relive the lives and re-die the deaths of the vaudeville. …

“The man with the chef’s hat and meatball puppet … calmed hospital patients and veterans through a nest of spaghetti. Just past the gurgle of the lobby fountain was Barbie Q. Chicken, a 4-year-old bird who was both Broadway prima donna and antibullying activist. Beside the wall of potted plants was Danny, an underweight and barefoot hillbilly from the mountains of West Virginia, and further beyond him was Herman the Worm (pronounced ‘Hoiman Da Woim’), a cross-eyed caterpillar made out of a dryer vent hose. Beep, a monkey, was kitty-corner, behind me were Doodle the toad and the handsomely breasted showgirl Miss Trixie, and now approaching with tensed biceps was Rocco, the muscular pit bull from Staten Island. … Some had that sort of vaporizing charisma; some, one could tell, had the limper, more sheepish personalities of those whose lives are defined by long stretches of extreme silence. As the lobby mushroomed with figures of felt, wood, and PVC tubing, they formed a great chorus of flopsy [creatures] that would not shut up.

“First-timers formed lines against the marble  —  our official title was ‘red dotters,’ after the distinguishing round stickers on our name tags. … Men, eager to know what brought me to ventriloquism, showed me photos of daughters, wives, dogs, farms. Men, who were not full-timing entertainers, were retired dental hygienists, hairdressers, firefighters, ranchers. Retired anythings. …

“Northern Kentucky was never exactly a likely mecca for the ventriloquial arts. In the 1920s, barrooms across the nation boomed with the surrealist showbiz acts of American vaudeville. From Midwestern saloons and small-town beer halls to New York’s glitzy Palace Theater, most cities welcomed troupes where magicians charmed, plate spinners spun, contortionists contorted, and ventriloquists  … threw their voices across club circuits that sold the business of analog enchantment. When the theaters darkened in the Depressive ’30s, televised variety shows shuttled ventriloquism safely to the entertainment capitals of Los Angeles and New York, though the rise of more sophisticated special effects began to render dummies anachronistic as early as the mid-’60s. By the early ’70s, when vent-prominent programs like The Ed Sullivan Show had sunsetted to make way for sitcoms, the ventriloquist-and-dummy act was already approaching something like near-obsolescence.

“A tile salesman, one William Shakespeare Berger, homed his collection of dummies in his garage in Fort Mitchell, Kentucky. Before his passing, in 1972, he donated his entire estate to establish Vent Haven, the world’s only museum devoted to ventriloquiana. The Vent Haven ConVENTion, now in its forty-ninth year, is presently six miles away from the original site of Berger’s family home, and functions as ventriloquism’s true earthly haven:. …

“The general act of learning ventriloquism is tedious, because the puppet is an instrument, and only one half of the theater routine. It is an ancient art, a maze of gestures and shadow gestures. … Nimble fingers tweak at little pinches and squeeze-boxes stuck inside the cavities of the ventriloquial dolls … while the tongue operates flawlessly under confinement. …

“There is no real ‘throwing’ of the voice, alas; the ear’s deficits are made up for by the eye, which focuses on the puppet’s moving jaw, forming the suggestion that whatever’s being said by you is said by your companion. The most problematic letters of the alphabet  —  there are five of them  —  inspire too much frottage between lips, which explains why puppets often have jeery, whiny, heavily accented, broken, or otherwise goofy voices: these are coping mechanisms, rerouted into hallmarks of the form.

“Take the letter p, an annoying plosive. Under the standard ventriloquial straitjacketry of (1) a relaxed jaw, (2) slightly open but stiffened lips, and (3) a closed set of teeth, a phrase like ‘I like to hike’ is shockingly easy to pronounce, whereas ‘I prefer puppetry’ is humbling. To dodge the automatic, upper-to-lower-lip kiss involved in expressing the letter p, ventriloquists hump the back of the tongue against the soft palate and vault air right through the back. In practice, this sounds much like the letter t. The ventriloquist thinks p, says their muffled t, and does this ad nauseam until the letter is strong and clear. (‘I trefer tuttetry.‘)”

Lots more at n+1, here. Did you ever try to do this?

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Photo: Seattle Miniature Show.

One of the many small challenges of our downsizing process has been what to do with Suzanne’s elaborate dollhouse, one that I ordered (even before she was born) from a talented high school student written up in a local paper.

It’s not that there aren’t plenty of people who would want a dollhouse that has wallpaper and electric lights, but maybe Suzanne still wants it. She’s not sure. The charm of miniatures is long-lasting.

Emma Orlow wrote about this charm recently at the New York Times. “Moments before 10 a.m., a security guard thanked the crowd for being cooperative.

“When the clock struck the hour, it became clear why: The doors of the Marriott Chicago O’Hare conference center opened, and hundreds of attendees, a majority of whom were over the age of 60, bee-lined as fast as they could to the booths.

“Many had studied the color-coded map ahead of time listing each booth’s location and came prepared with a shopping plan — a scene that could easily be mistaken for a Black Friday sale. Instead, it was the Chicago International Miniatures Show.

“Despite the gathering touting itself as ‘the World’s No. 1 Dollhouse Miniatures Show,’ there aren’t many actual dollhouses. Attendees instead sift through thousands of tiny objects that fill these tiny homes: miniature sponges, chocolate fondue fountains, rocking chairs, barbecue sets, Tupperware containers or fly swatters.

“The Tom Bishop show, as many attendees call it, is considered by its founder, Mr. Bishop, to be the largest dollhouse miniatures event in the world. Numbers appear to support that claim. This year, over 250 vendors traveled from 21 countries and 35 states. …

“Mr. Bishop estimates he has done over 500 miniature shows around the world, though in recent years he has downsized to only Chicago, which has been a continuous stop for nearly 40 years. Even the hotel itself is personal for Mr. Bishop: It’s where he and his wife, Leni, 77, spent the first night of their honeymoon.

“In 1977, the duo relocated from Chicago to Margate, Fla., where they opened their dollhouse store, Miniland, before closing it in 1984 to focus their attention on traveling conventions. Mr. Bishop, who also worked for American Airlines for 17 years, was inspired to create his own show after attending others that ‘weren’t run very well,’ he said. …

“Teri, 77, of Teri’s Mini Workshop, who declined to give her last name, said she wouldn’t have been able to showcase her miniature nacho cheese machines, plates of gefilte fish or medical supplies (about $10) had a booth not dropped out last minute. She hoped her soft power would be her low pricing, in contrast to some other tables, where pieces can go for hundreds of dollars a pop.

“If a collector wants something one of a kind, it might sell out on the first day, said Becky Evert, 68, a customer who had traveled from Denver with friends for the event. ‘Did I come with a budget? Yes,’ she said. ‘Did I stay to it? No.’ Of her seven years in attendance, it was the largest crowd she had ever seen.

“Beth Pothen, 42, who runs Mountain Creek Miniatures and is a full-time postal worker, is a second-generation miniaturist, making items like goth furniture and Christmas cookie trays (she got her start at a Girl Scouts craft fair). She drove from Spokane, Wash., for the convention and hoped to recoup the cost of travel and labor, and then some, she said. Individual tables cost $325, and some opt to have two at their booth, according to Mr. Bishop.

“While there’s value in breadth like that of Ms. Pothen’s, others distinguish themselves with a more niche focus. Kristin Castenschiold, 41, of Heartfelt Canines in Green Village, N.J., made a name for herself selling miniature dogs on Etsy — ‘I get some of the hair from a friend who is a pet groomer,’ she said — and has since expanded to all kinds of furry friends, miniature light-up aquariums and trompe l’oeil cat litter boxes.

“Margie Criner, 53, of Chicago’s Itty Bitty Mini Mart, makes miniatures as part of her full-time fine art practice (she’s currently on display at the traveling show ‘Small is Beautiful‘), but wanted a way to make her work more accessible. Her tiny items, which include translucent Jell-O and teensy records from the rock band Television, are inspired by items she had growing up.

“Ms. Criner is a part of a new generation of miniature makers, following in the footsteps of artists like Laurie Simmons, bringing the genre out from the home, into the gallery — with designs more modern and cheeky than the antiquarian selections that once came to define the miniature world.

“While it can be hard to stand out, everyone described the world of miniature selling and buying as quite collaborative and joyful.”

More at the Times, here.

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