
An emu. Would you want to cross a guy who looks at you like your third grade teacher at her most exasperated?
Never leave the scene of an accident. That’s today’s message from the Animal Kingdom.
Jennifer Hassan writes at the Washington Post about a recent lesson from the UK.
“England has two new, unexpected celebrities — a 42-year-old chef and a massive emu, who inadvertently teamed up to help catch a driver who fled a crash scene after narrowly missing pedestrians and causing extensive damage.
“Dean Wade said he heard a loud ‘screeching noise’ near his workplace in Wiltshire, southwest England, on Monday and raced out to see a jeep careening before smashing into the front of an empty shop.
“In an interview with the Washington Post on Wednesday, Wade, who has been working at the Old Bell Hotel in Malmesbury for only two weeks, said he could see the driver, who ‘appeared drunk,’ was getting ready to back away from the scene. A female passenger had left the vehicle.
“ ‘There’s no way you’re going anywhere,’ Wade told the man, who he said was ‘swaying’ and ‘staggering.’ all over the place. …
“Wearing his slip-resistant rubber kitchen clogs and chef’s overalls, Wade chased the driver for 15 to 20 minutes, through bushes, allotments and gardens before the pair ended up at an animal sanctuary. …
“ ‘I could see this massive emu,’ Wade said. ‘I’m six foot tall and it was bigger than me.’
“Wade said he could tell the bird, which was surrounded by its offspring, was likely to spring into defense if anyone intruded its enclosure.
“ ‘Mate, don’t go in there,’ Wade warned the man, who he said ignored his advice, replying: ‘I can fight emus’ before heading into the animal’s pen — where he was repeatedly pecked.
‘It was stabbing his body all over,’ Wade said, causing the man to curse and unsuccessfully attempt to ‘kung-fu-kick’ the animal away.
“The bird kept stabbing at the driver, who eventually gave up, fled the pen and headed toward a river — while Wade took the opportunity to flag down a nearby police car. …
“Following ‘an extensive search of the area,’ officials said, one person had been arrested after driving drunk. They did not name a suspect.
“Wade told the Post that he had just relocated from the sprawling city of Leeds to the picturesque village of Malmesbury for his new job at the Old Bell Hotel, which claims to be England’s oldest hotel. According to its website, the venue has served travelers since 1220.
“ ‘In Leeds, we don’t stand by and do nothing,’ Wade said, crediting his home city of West Yorkshire and his passion for justice for providing him with the instinct to chase the driver.
“Emus are classified as one of the world’s biggest birds, according to National Geographic. The animals can weigh up to 97 pounds and grow over six feet tall. While they cannot fly, they have ‘long, powerful legs’ that they often use to kick predators that come too close.
“Wade was keen to stress that he did not consider the birds aggressive but, rather, ‘curious creatures’ that are determined to protect their young. …
“Wade admitted his new life and job in Malmesbury had so far surpassed all expectations: uniting with an emu to solve crime; being invited to appear on national radio and TV in the UK; and fielding interview requests. …
“The emu, despite its newfound fame, has retained a lower profile, with the wildlife sanctuary declining interviews but telling national broadcaster BBC that all its emus were unharmed and that they are ‘wonderful creatures.’
“Following Wade and the emu’s successful partnership, the hotel and the animal sanctuary have also teamed up — striking a deal that sees staff deliver bucket loads of vegetable peelings from the kitchen to the animals each day in a bid to reduce food waste.”
It’s an ill wind that blows nobody good. More at the Post, here.
Wow. That’s quite a story. And it appears to have a somewhat happy, sustainable ending: “Following Wade and the emu’s successful partnership, the hotel and the animal sanctuary have also teamed up — striking a deal that sees staff deliver bucket loads of vegetable peelings from the kitchen to the animals each day in a bid to reduce food waste.” Hurrah!
Wonder if the perpetrator turned over a new leaf. That would be the icing on the cake.
Delightful, if somewhat gruesome.
Makes me think of the goofy Tim Cahill book title “Pecked to Death by Ducks.”
Phew! Watch out for emus. I especially like how the story had a happy ending, with buckets of vegetable peelings going to the animals.
Interesting how when random things collide, something new can emerge.